Random Acts of Journalism

Another tank of gas down, this one was about the same as last time…26.1 mpg…i think i can do better, but it’s pretty tough in the summer with the traffic and the AC running. Might have to save that 400 mile tank for Fall. The other downside is that gas is now $4+ a gallon (i actually paid $4.45 for 91 octane on this tank…kill me), so that $600 i was saving is vanishing in a hurry. Garret sent me this great article that has me re-inspired for the next tank of gas. Apparently, i’m a “hypermiler” now.

Funny story about driving slow… I think the biggest factor in saving gas is how you accelerate, so i’ve been getting going pretty slow lately. I hated, HATED when people did this to me when i was a fast driver but now that i’m driving slower i feel like i’m right and everyone else is wrong so fuck them, right? So i’m accelerating slow at this light the other day and this guy is honking at me like the asshat that he is. Being the spiteful person that i am, i react by going even slower. We go up the freeway on-ramp and he tries to get around me but we both get caught at the metered lights and i get the green first. Again, i accelerate very slowly (but this time on to a freeway in which people are averaging 80mph), he comes racing up behind me and crosses the gore point (big, big no-no in AZ) to get around me…but right as he comes up on my bumper in the lane next to me, i flip my blinker on and slide over, right in front of him, cutting him off. The dude is, of course, totally enraged at this point but can’t merge into the other lanes because of other cars coming. So he’s stuck behind me doing 65 mph on the nose. He finally gets a window, merges left to go around me, and i cut him off again. I’m dying of laughter at this point, because punishing douchetards is one of my favorite things in life. We’re about 3 miles down the freeway now, right where it starts to get crowded and he gets wedged in between two cars going the speed limit with me in front of him, and i’ve got him totally at my mercy. I kept him boxed in and totally frustrated for 12 whole miles all the way to my exit. Hahahaha. I love me.

Back to the point though, my car is about to hit 75k miles and i’m honestly thinking about turning it in for a hybrid very, very soon. I absolutely hate the look (and resulting mentality) of the Prius, but the Tesla is pretty awesome!

I checked the bus routes that would get me to my job 15 miles away from my house, and it would take an hour and drop me off 4 miles away…so unless Sam has a bike i can have, that’s just not an option. Fuck you very much, Phoenix.

Tila Tequila is claiming responsibility for gay marriage being legal in California…this would be a sign of the apocalypse but the only thing Tila is responsible for is giving herpes to men and women instead of just sticking to one gender…and herpes can’t kill you.

We don’t have enough stupidity on FoxNews so they hired Mike Huckabee. (glad to see that dumbass get held accountable).

Your shower curtain can kill you…welp, that’s pretty much everything now, isn’t it?

Have you seen failblog? Quite amusing.

It’s been a big week, so i’m shutting it down. Enjoy your weekend fools.